The Nourished Woman with Keri Marino

How to Break Free from Limiting Beliefs and Let Good Things In

• Keri Marino • Episode 19

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Most of us aren’t stuck because we don’t want change — we’re stuck because our bodies are still wired for what feels familiar. In this episode, I share what it really takes to grow when your nervous system keeps choosing the past. You’ll learn how to make peace with the parts of you that resist, move through fear without shutting down, and start letting yourself receive more love, ease, and joy than you ever thought possible.

We’ll talk about why growth can feel uncomfortable (and why that’s actually a good sign), how to spot limiting beliefs as they show up in your relationships and daily life, and the small somatic shifts that help you feel safe expanding into the woman you’re becoming. This one’s for the yoga-loving, self-aware woman who’s ready to stop doubting herself and start trusting the calm, confident version of her that’s been waiting to lead.

SPEAKER_00:

Welcome to the Nourished Woman Podcast, a space for women who've been doing the work to grow and heal and are ready to feel good again, body, mind, and soul. I'm your host, Carrie Marino, somatic yoga therapist of over 16 years, mentor and mama of three. I help women like you fall in love with how yoga makes you feel. Alchemi the hard things you've been through and experience more pleasure and aliveness in your body and relationships. I'm so glad you're here. Let's dive in. I just know I can't survive without mysteries. And I feel like, first off, if you're even having thoughts like that, like, okay, how do I actually break these patterns? How do I lead from my highest self? How do I let my intuition, your intuition that came out funny? How do you let your intuition be what is making the decisions for you? Then first off, that's pretty high-level thinking, and I want to celebrate that with you. And also I want to talk about how it's an identity shift to believe that you can choose something different for yourself. Because before you do any yoga or heal the things that need tending or nurture the parts of you that need nurturing, your nervous system patterning, your identity is wrapped up in the old stories and your past experiences. And so, in order for you to even feel free enough to know, like, okay, actually I can choose in the present moment what I want for myself and actually actually take action to help create what I want to see in my life, that is you stepping into a new identity on a whole new level. You are calibrating what is possible for you based on the present moment and the future outcomes that you want to have in your relationships and in your life and in your bank account and in the way that you look at yourself in the mirror, you're choosing to shift that. And I first just want to wrap you in the biggest podcast hug and say that I see you, sister, and I'm celebrating you, and I'm here walking this path with you. And I know so many beautiful women that are also walking this path with you. And I mean like beautiful inside and out. So good on you for knowing that it's possible to create something different for yourself. And also true, it's kind of hard to actually do that because your old patterning is pretty well grooved in the neural pathways of your brain and in the way that you make choices and then the way that you think and the emotions that you cycle back to and in the responses in your body. And so you're coming up against the programming, the software, the patterns that live inside of you. And it's it takes real effort to not rubber band back and slip back into the old those old patterns. And part of that is really shifting how you relate to the limiting beliefs when they come up or to the discomfort that you feel in your body when you're putting yourself in the vulnerable position to grow or do things differently. Like that requires you to not interpret that discomfort of growing and expanding yourself or shifting what you can tolerate in terms of what feels comfortable for you beyond what you've known in the past. That takes conscious effort. We we like to have a vision board. We like to dream up what we want. We like to have this, the thoughts around here's what I want, and I know what I want, and here's what it would look like, and here's when I'd like to have it. And it's easy to get so bogged down in the details of what you want. And it's and to actually move towards what it is that you're desiring, whether it be a deeper sense of intimacy and honesty with your partner, or more pleasure as you move through your days, like you're actually savoring simple moments with yourself. When you drink a cup of coffee, you're actually tasting it. When you get a hug from your kid, you're really leaning in, you're actually enjoying your time together to play. Whether it be taking that bold step that you want to take professionally or personally, or putting yourself out there, or taking those risks that you know are really good risks for you to take, but they're scary, or even just shifting the way that you think about yourself, right? Because those old patterns, those old grooves are familiar and you're literally wired to keep repeating those. And so, in order for you to actually own and embody the nourished woman that you're becoming into, it takes effort, it takes work for you to keep choosing that, and maybe equally important, not choosing the old pattern, who you're not choosing to be. And so part of this comes down to energy management. And in the yoga philosophy, we we talk they talk a lot about this in yoga philosophy. And it's the idea that your life energy, your prana is sacred and what you're pouring it into is is very potent. And what you're not pouring it in is really important and matters. And so I like to think of this work that I'm talking about of that uncomfortable growth edge of I actually have to actively choose what I am gonna put my thoughts behind. What are you gonna put your time and energy and beliefs behind from the standpoint of is this in alignment with what I want to create for myself, or is this not in alignment of what I want to create for myself? And so right now, I want you to think of a certain situation that you're wanting to grow around and do things differently around. And if you can get really specific. And if it's hard for you to think of something right now that's okay, make a mental note of this and let your intuition bring it to you later. With this very specific thing in your mind that you want to do differently, that you want to see some growth, that you want to see yourself expand around, I want you to notice where you get hung up. So, what triggers arise that spin you back into old patterns. When this particular trigger arises, then self-doubt comes in. Then you start to question whether you can actually have the thing that you want. Then you start to question whether what you're feeling or experiencing is valid, or if the worst is actually going to happen, or if you don't have what it takes, or if that person can't give you what you want, or they can't actually have those conversations with you. Like, I want you to start noticing the desire that you have that you feel really strongly from within. This is not a surface-level desire for like a Birken bag. This is a more soulful desire. I mean, nothing wrong with a Birken bag. I honestly don't even know what those look like, but I know that it's a thing. A soulful desire that you're wanting to lean into. And then where you get hung up, and then this is that moment where if you're really honest with yourself, all of that past programming, all of the neural patterning in your brain and nervous system are giving you a lot of certainty based on a past experience or many past experiences. They're telling you with certainty that this outcome is not possible or gonna go wrong in all these different ways, or you can't have that, or you need to you need to go back to the way you used to do things, you're gonna have a certain level of certainty that comes in. And if you're not present and self-aware, staying rooted in your yoga practice, by the way, can actually really help you with that. If you're not able to observe these things, you're gonna be totally bogged down in it. You're gonna be tangled up in the emotions and the thoughts and the limiting beliefs and the old pattern. And you'll keep repeating that. And also true, you can decide to make a different choice, to put your energy into something else. And that energy that you're gonna put into something else is gonna be more in the wheelhouse of what you actually want for yourself. So, for example, one of my growth edges that I've been working on for a couple of years now is around money and money beliefs. And I have done a ton of work around money mindset and spiritual approaches to money and all of these things. And I was in a coaching space with one of my coaches recently, and we were talking about this as a group, and I realized that I have accepted a standard with money that is not actually in alignment with what I want to create for myself. And so that's an example of like an edge for me is being able to choose a different standard of what I hold myself to and what I rise to when it comes to my capacity to receive money. And so you have your version of that. And it might be a relationship with your partner or your kids, it might be something about the way that you share your gifts in the world professionally. It might be money, it might be something else, it might be about your health, right? Your growth edge could be any number of things in this container. And all of us, you, me, every other woman around the world who listen to this podcast, we've got to at some point no longer be available for the old stinking thinking, right? And the old pattern to be the default pattern that we're choosing to put our energy into. And so if you are on that precipice of wanting to create something new for yourself and wanting to expand your capacity and wanting to grow and wanting to welcome in a level of existence that you know deep in your bones and in your soul and in your heart is just so in alignment for you. Like you can feel that it's what you really are stabbing into, then part of it is this work of being really honest with yourself about what you're pouring your energy into and what you're not, and then being willing to make a different choice. And then being able to sit in the awkward space between all of that because it sounds very easy to make a vision board and then expect things to just manifest for you. But we live in a world that requires both a feminine receiving and an openness and an intuitive approach, and also a masculine structure of actually doing and following through and holding the container and holding the vision and staying focused. And that gap right there, that gap between knowing what you want for yourself and then actually being able to live it and choose it and receive it, is an awkward space. It can be uncomfortable. I have literally had moments in my life where my nervous system felt anxious in different kinds of ease. Like I had to learn, and I've walked clients through learning how to actually be comfortable with getting what we want and trusting the process and the timeline and staying open and available for it to come in. And putting your energy and your belief and your actions again and again and again and again behind what you want. I think that we don't talk enough. And I want to talk to you about this here today, and I want to talk to you about this more in the future, about the work that it actually takes after you've healed something. Because after you've healed something, after you've had a breakthrough, after you've come to know a level of you, it's all it's not like all the things just flow and everything's simple and straightforward, and everything you want just falls into your lap, like right away, immediately, here it is. There's there's this work around actually being available for those good things to pour in. And that's awkward and it takes commitment and it takes effort. And it can also be so much easier. So if you're listening to this and you've ever had one of those moments where you're like, I want this thing, I've done this healing work, I'm trying to get this thing to happen. It won't happen. When is it gonna happen? What like getting frustrated with yourself or with the circumstances or with the timing, then I just want you to know that you're not alone, love, and that if you want to be available for all your frustration, that that's one way to do it. And another way to do it is to keep choosing your power and to putting your certainty behind what you know is possible and shifting your frequency to open up the room within you to actually be available for what you want to pour in and getting yourself comfortable with the new threshold of what you want to receive. So, for example, if you're wanting to be able to receive a deeper level of intimacy with your partner, if you're wanting to be able to have really deep conversations with your partner about hard topics that are difficult for you to share, or if you want to improve your sexual relationship with your partner or with yourself, it takes you being willing to be vulnerable to a certain degree in order to let those things happen and to actually let someone give you what it is that you want them to give you. Being open and available for whatever it is that you want to pour into you to actually pour into you. You've got to give other people permission to give it to you. I just want you to know that I see you. I know the work that it takes to expand yourself. And I just want to reflect back to you that I believe it's possible for you, and that it may take longer than you want, and that it's also something that you can lean into, and you'll get there faster if you can be really honest with yourself in this way and keep choosing to make room within your nervous system and body and heart and soul for what you want to pour in and to stop holding it so tightly or white knuckling it or trying to control everything, and to actually just take small actions in little moments every day to move yourself in the direction that you want to go and then not slip back into these old patterns. If you do slip back into these old patterns, it may be that you need to do some healing work around that part. Is there some layer of you that needs love and care and needs to be, needs to process what she's feeling or move it through her body and then get back on the horse and choose again, okay, I loved on that part, I met that part's needs, and also true. This is what's important to me. I've got more important shit to do than just spiral out into my old patterns. I want to move forward with what I want to move forward on and just that like beautiful honesty that you can have with yourself. All right, if this is landing, if this feels like it's hitting home for you, I want to invite you. I have a workshop coming up on Friday, December 12th inside the Nourished Women's Sanctuary. There'll be replays available if you can't make it live. It's a Zoom workshop called Break Free, Move Beyond Fear and Limiting Beliefs. And we're going to be unpacking this in real time. I'm going to be talking with the women who are members. I'm going to be answering your questions. I'm going to be giving you insight and coaching into how to work through your fears and limiting beliefs so that you can break free and you can really make space for what you are wanting in your life. You can join the Nourished Woman with a free trial through the end of December. And the details are in the show notes. Thank you so much for listening to the Nourished Woman podcast. I would love to hear what resonated with you and what you're carrying with you out into your life. Send me a message on Instagram at the Nourished Woman or even in my email. Your messages really mean the world to me, so don't be shy. The beautiful music that you're hearing is by Sean Johnson and the Wild Lotus Band. You can find them on all streaming platforms. I'll see you next week for another episode.